When I first boarded the plane to Riberalta, Bolivia in June 2019, I had no idea that the next ten days would fundamentally reshape my understanding of existence, consciousness, and the interconnectedness of all life.
This is the story of my complete Ayahuasca retreat experience in Riberalta, Bolivia – a journey that took me through four powerful ceremonies with the jungle shaman Niño, challenging my beliefs, healing my wounds, and introducing me to dimensions of reality I never knew existed.
This Ayahuasca retreat in Bolivia was a turning point in my life.
The Journey Begins: Arrival and the Tobacco Ceremony
My flight from La Paz took me deep into the Bolivian Amazon.
The rainforest stretched endlessly beneath the airplane.
What struck me most was how little pristine rainforest remains intact.
It was a sobering reminder of what we’re losing.
I arrived in Riberalta at 11:10 AM.
To my surprise, I recognized a Swedish backpacker named Chris whom I’d met months earlier in Argentina.
He was also heading to the same retreat center.
This felt like a meaningful coincidence.
We were joined by Tammi, a Scottish marine biologist, and her boyfriend William from the Cayman Islands.
The retreat center director, Erik, picked us up in a large 4×4 Jeep.
He drove us through the jungle landscape to the Pisatahua Retreat Center.
Upon arrival, Chris and I received an unexpected accommodation upgrade.
We got a beautiful bungalow with our own bathroom, a magnificent view of the jungle lake, and the most comfortable hammock I’d ever experienced.
That evening, our shaman Niño informed us about the tobacco ceremony.
It was mandatory before participating in the actual Ayahuasca ceremonies.
This ceremony would cleanse our bodies through vomiting and diarrhea.
It would prepare us for the profound experiences to come.
This Ayahuasca retreat in Bolivia was already proving to be full of surprises.
The Purge: A Lesson in Surrender
The ceremony began at 8 PM.
I quickly learned that “purging” is a completely individual experience.
While some participants filled their bowls multiple times, I spent the entire two-hour ceremony drinking over three liters of water.
I experienced intense stomach pressure, but never actually vomited.
I felt like an outsider in what I jokingly called the “vomit circle.”
Everyone else seemed to be purging while I remained mysteriously resistant.
After the ceremony ended, I returned to the bungalow feeling relatively okay.
But within minutes, my body began its own delayed purging process that lasted through the night.
This was a vulnerable moment for me, feeling like my body was failing to do what was expected.
The dreams that followed were unlike anything I’d experienced before – strange, vivid, and somehow different from my normal dream patterns.
The next morning, I woke to the incredible sounds of the jungle: bird chirping and animal screams that served as nature’s alarm clock.
Yoga before breakfast helped me recover from the night’s ordeal.
By lunchtime, I was ready to begin the real work of this Ayahuasca retreat in Bolivia.
Fun Fact:
Tobacco ceremonies have been used by indigenous Amazonian shamans for centuries as a purification ritual.
Modern research shows that the alkaloids in tobacco can actually stimulate the parasympathetic nervous system.
This creates a state of deep relaxation before the more intense Ayahuasca experience.
First Ayahuasca Ceremony: The Shy Spirit and the Question of Trust
The day of the first ceremony arrived with a full moon.
Our shaman said this promised a particularly strong and energetic experience.
I spent the afternoon in meditation, mentally preparing myself for what was to come.
At 8 PM, we gathered in the Maloka – the ceremonial space.
Niño explained the rules.
Most importantly, once the ceremony began, we couldn’t leave until it ended, though we could visit the toilet as needed.
The ceremony began with the lighting of candles and the burning of jungle tobacco.
Its smoke was distributed throughout the room by Josefine, Niño’s Swedish partner.
One by one, we approached the shaman to receive our first cup of Ayahuasca.
This was followed by water and a pleasant-smelling oil to help suppress the urge to vomit.
I made myself comfortable on my mat.
Within minutes, the effects began.
The beams of the Maloka’s roof transformed into enormous beetles connected like a caterpillar or ant trail.
They all moved in synchronized patterns.
When one beetle changed direction, they all did – like a massive school of fish responding to invisible currents.
The hallucinations were mostly in dark gray and black tones.
I caught one brief glimpse of a beautiful, colorful parrot head on the ceiling before it vanished.
This Ayahuasca retreat in Bolivia was already showing me things beyond my wildest imagination.
The Whispering Shadow
Throughout most of the ceremony, I heard someone constantly whispering in my ear.
I couldn’t understand a single word.
I kept seeing a small shadow pass by me.
It was a round black head without eyes, nose, or mouth, and no visible arms or legs.
The more I tried to understand the whispering, the further away and more indistinct it became.
I realized later that this little spirit was afraid of me.
It was intimidated by my presence and therefore couldn’t show itself or communicate openly.
In my understanding, this was a reflection of my own energy.
I felt a deep sadness about this.
I know that I sometimes have this effect on people – an unintended intimidation that creates distance rather than connection.
This was a vulnerable moment for me, facing a part of myself I didn’t like.
I hoped I would encounter this spirit again in future ceremonies.
I wanted to finally provide enough safety and trust for it to reveal itself.
The ceremony ended with a beautiful final ritual.
Niño blew sacred tobacco smoke over each participant, thanking us individually.
Surprisingly, I didn’t have to vomit or experience diarrhea during this ceremony.
This was a rarity that would become a pattern throughout my Ayahuasca retreat in Bolivia.
Fun Fact:
Ayahuasca contains DMT (dimethyltryptamine).
This is a naturally occurring compound that the human brain actually produces in tiny amounts.
It is particularly active during REM sleep and possibly at the moment of death.
This might explain why near-death experiences often resemble Ayahuasca visions.
Second Ayahuasca Ceremony: Dimensions of the Spirit World and Life After Death
The morning of the second ceremony, I had the profound honor of helping prepare the Ayahuasca brew itself.
This was a closely guarded secret.
Being invited to participate felt like a sacred privilege.
The preparation process was surprisingly simple yet incredibly labor-intensive.
The Ayahuasca plant – a special liana that grows in the Amazon – is boiled together with the leaves of a bush called Chacruna for many hours.
The plant must be carefully scraped to remove a moss layer without damaging the thin brown skin underneath.
Then comes the hard part: splitting the plant into fine fibers.
This is done by laying it on a tree trunk and hitting it repeatedly with a wooden club until the fibers almost separate on their own.
This Ayahuasca retreat in Bolivia was teaching me the deep connection between effort and reward.
After hours of preparation, the plant material is boiled down from 30-40 liters to just half a liter.
This creates a concentrated brew of incredible potency.
Fun Fact:
The Ayahuasca vine is sometimes called “the vine of the soul” or “the vine of the dead.”
It has been used by indigenous peoples for at least 5,000 years.
This makes it one of humanity’s oldest spiritual technologies for exploring consciousness.
A Test of Faith
That evening, I approached the ceremony with a mixture of excitement and anxiety.
I had so many questions I wanted answered:
Who am I really?
How can I trust people again?
Will humanity destroy itself and our planet, or will we recover?
The ceremony began like the first one.
But this time I felt nothing for the first hour.
I drank a second cup, still feeling nothing.
By the time I drank a third cup, I was disappointed and frustrated.
I felt like I’d wasted money on an experience that wasn’t working.
This was a moment of doubt and frustration during my Ayahuasca retreat in Bolivia.
Then I remembered Niño’s words:
“Have faith in the medicine. It knows what is good for you. It will give you what you need.”
I surrendered completely.
I repeated internally:
“Ayahuasca, I trust you completely. Do with me whatever you want. I give myself completely into your hands.”
And then, suddenly, it began.
Lines of color – blue, red, and yellow – flickered across my vision like an old television adjusting its signal.
When the signal finally aligned, I found myself in a completely black dimension that lasted only a moment before transforming into something extraordinary.
The spirit world built itself in seconds, layer by layer, like a massive 3D Tetris game creating multiple interconnected chambers.
Each chamber was an oval or egg-shaped dimension.
I could see three distinct realms:
One for our earthly existence, one for happy and joyful spirits, and one for dark and unhappy spirits.
All were connected by tunnel systems.
I understood that after death, souls cross through these tunnels into the next dimension.
The Dimension of Joy
For most of the ceremony, I remained in the dimension of happy, joyful, and friendly spirits.
The colors were impossibly bright and shimmering.
It was a bright green-yellow light that never dimmed, with no need for a sun.
Everyone in this dimension danced with full energy to the shaman’s singing.
They were completely free of worry, evil thoughts, or harmful intentions.
Words were unnecessary; communication happened through pure feeling and understanding.
I realized that all my questions didn’t actually need answers.
It doesn’t matter whether you can trust people 100%, why there is so much violence and crime, or why humanity behaves the way it does.
What truly matters is treating everyone with respect, equality, justice, and fairness.
This was a profound insight from my Ayahuasca retreat in Bolivia.
Fun Fact:
Many people who have near-death experiences report seeing a tunnel with a bright light at the end.
Ayahuasca users often describe similar tunnel imagery.
This suggests that the brain might access similar neural pathways during both experiences, whether triggered by physical death or psychedelic compounds.
A Message of Unity
Toward the end of the ceremony, I experienced something profound.
I looked through the eyes of different people – a person with Down syndrome, an elderly man, and a person with paraplegia.
No matter whose eyes I looked through, absolutely nothing had changed in the spirit dimension.
Everyone was equally happy, equally connected, and equally valued.
When my own spirit returned to my body, I simultaneously experienced all three conditions.
I was old, had Down syndrome, and was paraplegic all at once.
I couldn’t move even a finger, and I was drooling while grinning from ear to ear.
Yet I was profoundly, inexplicably happy.
This taught me the most important lesson:
our physical limitations, our differences, our circumstances—none of it matters in the end.
What matters is the state of our consciousness, our capacity for love, and our connection to all beings.
When the ceremony ended and the shaman performed the final ritual, I was so overwhelmed with gratitude.
I thanked Ayahuasca at least a hundred times.
The happiness that flooded through me was so intense that I could barely contain my laughter.
This Ayahuasca retreat in Bolivia had given me a glimpse of true unity.
Third Ayahuasca Ceremony: Mother Nature Reveals Herself
The morning of the third ceremony was special.
It was the summer solstice, the longest day of the year.
Our shaman had explained that this day promised a particularly powerful ceremony.
Additionally, we would be drinking Ayahuasca that we had helped prepare ourselves.
It was infused with our own energy, sweat, and effort.
Niño told us that Ayahuasca would know we had participated in her creation.
She would know that we genuinely wanted to learn from her, and that we weren’t afraid of hard work to be worthy of her medicine.
I spent the afternoon in a special drum meditation, preparing my mind and spirit for what was to come.
That evening, I decided to ask Ayahuasca a practical question:
“What is the best way to achieve financial freedom?”
But every time I focused on this question, the effects of Ayahuasca would disappear completely, as if they’d never been there.
As soon as I stopped concentrating on the question, the effects would return.
This happened four times before I finally understood:
This wasn’t the right question for this ceremony.
This was a lesson in itself during my Ayahuasca retreat in Bolivia.
A Royal Welcome from Mother Nature
When I received my second cup – a full one instead of the half cup I expected – I felt it was the right decision, even though I nearly vomited drinking it.
After everyone had received their second cup, Ayahuasca returned with full force and energy.
I was greeted by a royal welcome from Mother Nature herself.
She appeared as a beautiful woman made of pure light.
She showed me the beauty of the jungle, the animals, and the plants – all in breathtaking detail.
I saw the world through her eyes.
And I understood that everything is connected, everything is alive, and everything is sacred.
I felt an overwhelming sense of love and gratitude for the planet and all its inhabitants.
I asked Mother Nature about my financial question again.
This time she answered.
She explained that money is just a tool, a form of energy.
True wealth comes from within.
Through aligning my work with my purpose and passion.
She encouraged me to share my experiences and insights with the world.
She wanted me to help others connect with their own inner wisdom and with the natural world.
This was a pivotal moment in my Ayahuasca retreat in Bolivia.
Fun Fact:
The Amazon rainforest produces 20% of the world’s oxygen.
This is why it’s often called “the lungs of the planet.”
It’s also home to an estimated 10% of the world’s known species.
The White Tiger
Later in the ceremony, I encountered a magnificent white tiger.
It was a powerful and majestic creature.
I felt a deep sense of awe and respect in its presence.
The tiger didn’t speak in words, but it communicated with me telepathically.
It showed me the importance of courage, strength, and integrity.
It taught me to trust my instincts and to walk my path with confidence and grace.
The Unfolding of Creation
Toward the end of the ceremony, I witnessed the unfolding of creation itself.
I saw the Big Bang, the formation of galaxies and stars, the birth of our planet, and the evolution of life.
I understood that we are all part of this grand cosmic dance.
Our individual lives are a precious and unique expression of the universe’s creative energy.
I felt a profound sense of connection to all of existence.
I knew that I was exactly where I was supposed to be.
Fun Fact:
The universe is estimated to be 13.8 billion years old.
Our solar system is about 4.6 billion years old.
The first signs of life on Earth appeared about 3.8 billion years ago.
A New Path Forward
Mother Nature’s message was simple:
“You always have a choice in everything. You have the freedom to shape your life however you want. And you can decide everything yourself. Your whole life is in your hands. If you’re not happy, you’re solely responsible, and no one else is to blame. You make every decision, no matter how small. No one can take that from you.”
She told me that whatever I choose, she can accept everything and will watch with great interest.
But she would be very happy if I chose something related to nature.
She wanted me to show people what Mother Nature has to offer, since people are increasingly forgetting that she exists and how beautiful and tender she can be.
“I’m very patient,” she said. “It doesn’t have to be immediate, but it would be very nice in the future.”
This was a clear call to action from my Ayahuasca retreat in Bolivia.
Integration and Transformation
The remaining days of the retreat were spent integrating these experiences.
We meditated and prepared to return to our normal lives with these profound new perspectives.
I left Bolivia with a renewed sense of purpose.
I had a even deeper connection to myself and the natural world.
And I also had a profound sense of gratitude for the healing power of Ayahuasca.
Fun Fact:
The word “Ayahuasca” comes from the Quechua language.
“Aya” means “spirit” or “soul” and “huasca” means “vine” or “rope.”
So, Ayahuasca can be translated as “the vine of the soul.”
Conclusion: A Life-Changing Experience
My Ayahuasca retreat in Bolivia was one of the most transformative experiences of my life.
It taught me about the nature of reality, the power of love, and the importance of living in alignment with my purpose.
I returned home with a new sense of clarity, a deeper connection to myself and the world, and a profound sense of gratitude for the healing power of this sacred medicine.
Fun Fact:
The use of Ayahuasca for spiritual and healing purposes has been documented for centuries.
It has only recently begun to gain recognition in the Western world for its potential therapeutic benefits.
The legal status of Ayahuasca varies from country to country.
In some countries, it is legal for religious and spiritual use.
In others, it is a controlled substance.
What are your thoughts on Ayahuasca?
Have you ever considered a similar journey?
Share your experiences with me on my social media channels!
I’d love to hear about your own experiences.
For more details of my spiritual journeys, check out my full diary: Ayahuasca retreat diary
Peace,
Ralph.
